It’s the Eve of Ash Wednesday and I admit... I still have no idea what I should “give-up” or “do-better” this Lent. In years past I’ve tried to give-up one major thing (usually in the form of sugar since I’m addicted to it) and I would also try to do one thing “better” or “more” for Jesus. For some reason, “getting it right”, this particular Lent seems extra important to me. Perhaps it’s because I’m at a crux in my life and need divine guidance and direction on major life decisions that part of me feels like “desperate times call for desperate measures”. I was actually considering fasting like one of the “super saints” this Lent (because I so clearly will be able to do that?!). I mean doesn’t fasting lead to a clear and concise mind, body, and spirit? I need a huge dose of that about now. And, isn’t fasting one of the most fruitful forms of prayer a person can accomplish? Then I came to my senses and realized that I’m setting myself up for failure, and more importantly, no one is going to want to be anywhere near me for the next 40 days. Lent could possibly become a form of torture for my family and friends. Now I’m sure Jesus does not want that!
So here I am, not convinced that giving-up alcohol, sweets, gluten and any form of culinary delight will deepen my relationship with Jesus. Don’t get me wrong, I know that fasting is good for the soul and it is necessary in our prayer lives, but I feel like I’m missing something major … like the whole point of Lent. I keep contemplating the ideas of “prayer, fasting, and alms-giving” and I cannot help but think that there’s more to Lent than being disciplined and battling your own personal willpower.
What I’m wondering is, was my previous approach to Lent too “me-focused” than “Jesus-focused”? It seems like all of these sacrifices become all about what I have done. Somehow Lent becomes all about me and what I can do, instead of becoming closer in my relationship with Jesus. I’m thinking that instead of focusing solely on sacrifice, maybe I should instead focus on consoling His sacred heart during Lent?
Is it possible that what Jesus so desperately yearns for is for us to simply stand lovingly and longingly at the foot of the Cross with our Blessed Mother, Mary, and His beloved disciple, John? One of His last pronouncements from the cross was “I thirst” and He wasn’t talking about water.
“At this most difficult time He proclaimed, 'I thirst.' And people thought He was thirsty in an ordinary way and they gave Him vinegar straight away; but it was not for that thirst; it was for our love, our affection, that intimate attachment to Him, and that sharing of His passion. He used, 'I thirst,' instead of 'Give Me your love'. . . 'I thirst.' Let us hear Him saying it to me and saying it to you.” - Mother Teresa
Jesus’ plea was so profound that Mother Teresa made it her life’s mission and goal to “quench Jesus’ thirst”. I’m now wondering if what it means to quench His thirst, is to console his heart through love and adoration?
So, if Jesus is calling me to console His Sacred Heart, how will I do this? How will I put this into action during Lent? Stay tuned. I’m hoping to figure this out rather quickly…
On a side note, I've been stuffing my face with every piece of candy and chocolate I can find in preparation for Ash Wednesday. I've literally thought Ash Wednesday was the last TWO Wednesdays. I have no excuse for my inability to look at a calendar...
And I'm sorry, this one is just too funny not to share...
